love letters to storytellers - dr. su hyun kim
This was initially sent via Mailchimp November 1, 2021.
featured storyteller
It’s late. Dishes litter the counter, our mugs are long emptied and cold, and most of our friends have gone home. I sit on the couch, my knees tucked up under me, still holding my empty mug, smiling at my friends. There’s only three of us left, of the seven of us that were all gathered earlier in the evening; seven of us that have survived as a friend unit since high school.
My friend Su Hyun is a quiet, thoughtful soul that I have always connected with in a unique way. We are both introverted, anxious souls who think way too much. I met Su Hyun in middle school. One of the first things I learned about her and her twin sister was that they had immigrated from Korea when they were ten, they studied hard, and they had cultural obligation to family and family expectations. Now, Su Hyun is studying medicine.
“So,” I say, absentmindedly taking a sip of air from my empty mug, “Why do you want to be a doctor?”
I had watched for years as Su Hyun worked hard in her studies since we were twelve. Su Hyun was always known, from middle school to university, as one of the top students in every class - although she worked hard for those grades. Every friend get-together, Su Hyun was talking about studying, or having to study, or taking breaks from studying. I also watched as Su Hyun struggled with debilitating anxiety and insomnia, as a result of the stress she took on from her studies. I knew being a doctor is one of the most stressful jobs you can have, and I knew Su Hyun to be very sensitive to stress. Why, then, pursue such a stressful job?
I lean forward to hear Su Hyun’s response in her quiet, gentle voice. “There are a lot of immigrants that are nervous about going to doctors, and don’t get the healthcare they need because of that. My mom is a nurse. I’ve seen how she’s encouraged immigrants to go to doctors. I want to be that person for them.”
A smile slowly spreads over my face, my heart and entire body filling with love and pride for my friend. She is going to do amazing things, I think, I just know it.
***
Su Hyun’s story is one of quiet, steady commitment to her goals and to her family. It was never a question that Su Hyun would not provide for her parents when they couldn’t provide for themselves anymore, and being a doctor seemed to her like a practical way to have a more financially secure future. Additionally, studying always came easy to Su Hyun, so the hours of studying to get into and through medical school didn’t phase her.
She also went into medicine because she had grand ideas about helping people, joining Doctors Without Borders, and changing the world. But over time, Su Hyun realized her skills were not in social justice activism, as her public speaking skills are limited. “As you grow up, you learn your limitations and let go of the person who you wish you were,” Su Hyun told me. “In high school, people tell you the sky is the limit and you think you can have everything. Once you start to grow up, you start to realize you can’t have it all. If you squeeze one end, the other end blows up. Now I am learning how to maximize flexibility within my limitations.”
Su Hyun is not an internationally renowned social justice advocate, but she is still changing the world. She is a voice to her community, just as she told me she wanted to be years ago. She has enough of an understanding of healthcare now that she can give people useful information, or tell people where to go to get help, that might be otherwise uncomfortable going to a clinical setting first.
I asked Su Hyun what it is like to be a female, Korean doctor who treats mostly elderly, Caucasian patients. She said she does have some interesting interactions with people, like when they talk about China to her as if she’s Chinese. “I don’t get offended, because I know where they’re coming from and, most of the time, people are kind.” She doesn’t see herself as anything special or unique in that regard. However, I can see that just by being herself - a female, Korean, second-gen immigrant doctor- in these historically white male-dominated spaces, she is demonstrating how the world can be. By simply doing her work, by living, by being, Su Hyun is writing a new story, one that maybe hasn’t been told before, but that is so, so important: a story of hope to those underrepresented in healthcare.
updates
Last month I talked a lot about editing. Now, edits are pretty much done and I'm onto the fun not-writing stuff. I am so grateful to everyone who helped me polish my writing to make it beautiful! My editor, Kyla Neufeld, is awesome and does freelance editing and you should hire her here.
So what's next? The next big chunk of book work is design, aka making it look less like boring text in a Word document and more like an actual book. I'm still just in early discussions with my designer, but every meeting she impresses me so I'm very excited to work with her more. You'll meet her eventually. ;)
As always, you can stay up to date with my projects through this newsletter and I am still posting poems occasionally on my Instagram. Also, if you are interested in my work, forward them my newsletter and tell them to subscribe!
Happy November!
Alyssa